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How do you correct your children without criticizing them? Monica Hinderer joins Doug discussing how constant criticism harms your children and how focusing on your child&rsquo;s unique strengths is part of the solution to raising confident children. &nbsp; Listener questions and comments: <ul> <li>Len - You guys do a great job. What made Monica want to go into her dad&rsquo;s profession? (18:16)</li> <li>Bob - On low self-esteem: I think low self-esteem is a virtue. It seems like the best people have had low self-esteem. (20:48)</li> <li>Peter - I'm a parent of four. When my three little girls were young, a lady told me 'don't be too hard on them because if so, they'll jump into another man&rsquo;s arms too early&rsquo;. (25:54)</li> <li>Marie - I have a son who is 49 years old. He's very adamantly opposed to me and is angry with me. I'm not sure why. (36:44)</li> <li>Sharon - My father was very critical and he was an alcoholic, even though he was very well-achieved. (43:06)</li> <li>Deedee - What if that child grew up to be an overachiever, after growing up in an overly critical home? (48:25)</li> </ul> &nbsp; Resources: Catholic Therapists <a href="https://catholictherapists.com/">https://catholictherapists.com/</a> &nbsp; Catholic Psychotherapy <a href="https://catholicpsychotherapy.org/">https://catholicpsychotherapy.org/</a> &nbsp; Marriage Unhindered <a href="https://www.marriageunhindered.com/">https://www.marriageunhindered.com/</a> &nbsp; Rekindled Hearts Marriage Bundle <a href="https://relevantradio.store/collections/books/products/marriage-bundle">https://relevantradio.store/collections/books/products/marriage-bundle</a> &nbsp; Happy Marriage for Life <a href="https://www.happymarriageforlife.com/">https://www.happymarriageforlife.com/</a> &nbsp; Negative outcomes of criticism &nbsp; <ol> <li>Low self esteem</li> <li>Perfectionism</li> <li>Negative self-talk</li> <li>Difficulty accepting compliments</li> <li>Tendency towards being hypercritical</li> <li>Becoming hyper defensive</li> <li>Becoming people pleasers</li> <li>Becoming too self-reliant</li> <li>Social anxiety</li> <li>Comparing&nbsp;</li> <li>Constant apology</li> </ol>

Your child’s unique strengths

Doug is joined by Monica Hinderer to talk about the damage criticism does to children: They discuss the many factors that can lead to criticism and share how parents can help children develop positive self-esteem. Doug and Monica tackle listener questions and comments on the following: ·         My adult daughter says we nitpick too much. I am just trying to correct or help her but she won't listen. ·         My mom was super critical and both my sister and I have made it a point to treat our daughters differently. ·         My son has really low self-esteem and I don't know how to help him. ·         My mother nags a lot but I don't see it as nagging and I love that she tells me these things. I think it's only through prayer that I am able to take it so well. ·         My son is an adult but I think I was critical his whole life and now everything seems like a criticism to him.

Criticism Harms Children

Doug goes to the mailbag and tackles topics such as premarital relations for seniors, narcissistic sisters-in-laws, and emotional affairs. &nbsp; &nbsp;

Healthy Relationships and Responding to Abuse

Peter and Theresa Martin join Doug to discuss The Wojtyla Community and Institute. Plus: Day 9 of the novena to Mary, Mother of Fairest Love. &nbsp; Listener questions and comments: <ul> <li>Denise - I'm dating my boyfriend and we're both Catholic. But he's following his ex on Instagram. It makes me uncomfortable, but he said they are just friends.&nbsp; What do you think? (38:26)</li> </ul> &nbsp; Resources: Fairest Love Family Project <a href="https://www.fairestlovefamilyproject.org/">https://www.fairestlovefamilyproject.org/</a> &nbsp; Wojtyla Community &amp; Institute <a href="https://www.wojtylaci.com/">https://www.wojtylaci.com/</a>

Families Striving for Holiness

Doug is joined by Monica Hinderer to continue their discussion about the damage criticism does to children: They share how damaging negative self-talk can be in raising children and the value of positive affirmation to combat the negativity. Doug and Monica tackle listener questions and comments on the following: &middot;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Doug goes to the mailbag and gives advice to a listener struggling with enmeshment and the impact it has during the holidays. &middot;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; My kindergartner talked about kissing a girl in his class. We thought it wasn't serious but the day he tried to kiss me; it was really weird. What should I do? &middot;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Struggling in disciplining stepdaughters. &middot;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; I wish my daughter in law would behave a certain way. How should I approach her directly? Resources: Marriage Unhindered <a href="https://www.marriageunhindered.com/">https://www.marriageunhindered.com/</a> &nbsp;

The value of positive affirmation

What is my Achilles’ heel — the one weakness that keeps me from fully turning toward God? In this Lenten meditation, Fr. Paul Donlan reflects on St. Josemaría’s call to continual conversion, emphasizing that the Christian life is not a one-time commitment but an ongoing, demanding transformation that requires identifying and confronting our most persistent fault, often rooted in one of the seven capital vices. Using the image of Achilles’ vulnerable heel, he challenges listeners to examine their conscience, cooperate actively with God’s grace, and strive to become true “salt of the earth” and “light of the world,” shining through concrete effort and daily struggle. Lent, Fr. Paul urges, is a powerful season to make a decisive step forward into acknowledging our weaknesses, desiring change, and courageously partnering with God to pursue deeper holiness.

Conquering Our Achilles’ Heel: The Call to Ongoing Conversion

#10MinuteswithJesus

** Put yourself in the presence of God. Try talking to Him.
** 10 minutes are 10 minutes. Even if you can get distracted, reach the end.
** Be constant. The Holy Spirit acts "on low heat" and requires perseverance.

10-Minute audio to help you pray.
Daily sparks to ignite prayer: a passage from the gospel, an idea, an anecdote and a priest who speaks with you and the Lord, inviting you to share your intimacy with God.
Find your moment, consider you are in His presence and click play.

17-01-26 Follow Me (NS)

What does it truly mean to “take up your cross daily” and follow Christ? In this meditation, Fr. Luke Mata explores Jesus’ most difficult teaching—the mystery of suffering and self-denial. He explains that daily mortification, or dying to oneself in small ways, transforms ordinary sacrifices into acts of love that participate in Christ’s redemptive work. Drawing from Scripture, the lives of saints, and personal anecdotes, Fr. Luke emphasizes that suffering, when united with love, becomes meaningful and salvific. Through perseverance, humility, and trust—especially in moments of struggle — believers grow in fortitude, self-control, and love, learning to see the cross not as punishment but as a path to holiness.

Daily Self-Denial and Redemptive Love

27-03-26 Plugged into Christ (JE)

Fr. Eric Nicolai preached this meditation on December 8th, 2025 at Lyncroft Centrre in Toronto. It has been worthwhile to prepare this solemnity because it tells us something hopeful about God’s plan of salvation, his desire for our redemption. He could count on this woman, not as a mere instrument, but as a free and active cooperator that was beautifully prepared and primed for the great work of salvation.We say she is immaculate, because she is without macula, without stain. The fathers of the Church teased out the Eve-Mary parallel: Mary was the new Eve.Music: relaxing-piano-music-248868Thumbnail: Bartolomé Esteban Murillo, The Immaculate Conception of Los Venerables (Soult Madonna), 1660–65, oil on canvas, (Museo Nacional del Prado)

The Immaculate Conception was part of Mary's Vocation

A meditation by Fr. Eric Nicolai preached at Lyncroft Centre in Toronto, June 7 2025. There is this incredible line in St. Paul in which he speaks of having the same sentiments that Christ Jesus had (cf. Phil 2:5). “Have among yourselves the same attitude that is also yours in Christ Jesus, Who, though he was in the form of God, did not regard equality with God something to be grasped. Rather, he emptied himself, taking the form of a slave, coming in human likeness; and found human in appearance, he humbled himself, becoming obedient to death, even death on a cross.”To empty ourselves like Christ, we must step down from our throne of self-importance.Music: Original track by Michael Lee of Toronto.

The Sentiments of Christ: Abdicate from your Throne

Luke 10:25-37: ‘A man was once on his way down from Jerusalem to Jericho and fell into the hands of brigands; they took all he had, beat him and then made off, leaving him half dead. Now a priest happened to be travelling down the same road, but when he saw the man, he passed by on the other side. In the same way a Levite who came to the place saw him, and passed by on the other side. But a Samaritan traveller who came upon him was moved with compassion when he saw him. He went up and bandaged his wounds, pouring oil and wine on them. He then lifted him on to his own mount, carried him to the inn and looked after him. Next day, he took out two denarii and handed them to the innkeeper. “Look after him,” he said “and on my way back I will make good any extra expense you have.” Which of these three, do you think, proved himself a neighbour to the man who fell into the brigands‘ hands?’ ‘The one who took pity on him’ he replied. Jesus said to him, ‘Go, and do the same yourself.’
Who or what are the other robbers in our life?
One might be our sheer busyness.
Busy is not your friend. It makes you feel overwhelmed, tired, and inadequate. If busy were a person, would you spend all day with that person today, and then all day with that person again tomorrow? I don’t think so.
A meditation by Fr. Eric Nicolai at Lyncroft Centre, October 5, 2022.
Music: Carlos Gardel, Soledad, arranged for guitar by Bert Alink.
Thumbnail: Rembrandt, The Good Samaritan 1630. Ink drawing, Rijiksmuseum, Public Domain.

The Good Samaritan and His Friend

Doug reads a letter by Alice Von Hildebrand from her book By Love Refined. In this letter, Alice gives advice on deepening friendships. Doug also unpacks things you should know if you decide to go to marriage therapy. He discusses the importance of gratitude and how it helps keep the focus on the positive.   Resources:   By Love Refined <a href="https://sophiainstitute.com/product/by-love-refined/?srsltid=AfmBOor69zErlUqf6RP4-3ZxPfKt8rMqVKFZpPQcjXBuSZBKh6q0taWX">https://sophiainstitute.com/product/by-love-refined/?srsltid=AfmBOor69zErlUqf6RP4-3ZxPfKt8rMqVKFZpPQcjXBuSZBKh6q0taWX</a>   Marriage Unhindered <a href="https://www.marriageunhindered.com/">https://www.marriageunhindered.com/</a>   Happy Marriage for Life <a href="https://www.happymarriageforlife.com/">https://www.happymarriageforlife.com/</a>   Catholic Therapists <a href="https://www.catholictherapists.com/">https://www.catholictherapists.com/</a>

Having an attitude of gratitude

Should I marry my baby's father? My husband won't show me his bank account. What should I do when marriage advice doesn't work? Doug goes to the mailbag. Listener questions and comments: <ul> <li>Vera - My boyfriend and I had a baby and we did break up. Then after 6 months we started dating, and now have been married for 44 years. We went to Confirmation classes together and got married in the Church. (14:47)</li> <li>Jean - How is the girl with the baby ever going to get her boyfriend out of the house. I don't think he'll leave. (22:29)</li> <li>Maria - My husband suggested that I open my own account. We've been married for 37 years. (38:38)</li> </ul> Resources: Happy Marriage for Life <a href="https://www.happymarriageforlife.com/">https://www.happymarriageforlife.com/</a> Relevant Radio Dad&rsquo;s Pack <a href="https://relevantradio.store/collections/merch/products/dads-pack">https://relevantradio.store/collections/merch/products/dads-pack</a> Rekindled Hearts Marriage Bundle <a href="https://relevantradio.store/collections/books/products/marriage-bundle">https://relevantradio.store/collections/books/products/marriage-bundle</a>

Should I marry my child's father?

Live from the National Eucharistic Congress from Indianapolis with Amanda Smith.

Natural Family Planning

A meditation preached by Fr. Eric Nicolai on a day of recollection in Ernescliff College on May 11, 2025.I saw photos of Pope Leo XIV visiting Santa Maria Maggiore, praying in front of the Icon of Our Lady, Mother of God. She is showing us the child. She is showing us her son during the month of May when we have recourse to her.We can ask him to stir up the fire of our faith. Put little twigs and branches into the fire. The best twigs to get that faith raging is the devotion to our mother, as mother.It may be small now, but little aspirations, glances at images of our Lady are there to awaken something within us. Josemaria would as to “Stir up that fire of faith. Christ is not a figure that has passed. He is not a memory that is lost in history.” Mary seems to stir up devotion in us. She awakens our faith and makes us strong. Music: Michael Lee of Toronto.Thumbnail: Icon of Mary in Santa Maria Maggiore, Rome.

Mary Protects us from Being Gloomy Saints

20-03-26 Help me to Save One More (GB)

A meditation preached by Fr. Eric Nicolai, December 21, 2022 at Lyncroft Centre, Toronto.
Phil 4, 4: “Rejoice in the Lord always”. Joy is at the heart of Christian experience. Pope Benedict XVI said that one of the great attraction of WYD was the joy that people saw. It is seen in young people, in the smiles of Pope Francis.
Pope Benedict XVI said “In a world of sorrow and anxiety, joy is an important witness to the beauty and reliability of the Christian faith.”
In a school you learn stuff. What are we going to learn today?
Music: Bert Alink, Mossy Garden, arranged on guitar.
Thumbnail: Raphael, &nbsp;Sistine Madonna 1513 Gemäldegalerie Alte Meister Dresden.

The School of Joy

16-12-25 Something Has to Stop the Flow (JPM)

Listen to the first chapter of our newest Scepter Title, Rekindled Hearts: A Spiritual Journey to Martial Healing by Doug Hinderer.

Heaven is Forever - Rekindled Hearts

18-01-26 Look at Him! (GJ)

One of the most inspiring, and hopeful passages in St. Paul is in his letter to Timothy, where he gives him pastoral instruction in dealing with the people of God.
1 Tim 2, 4: God desires all men to be saved and to come to the knowledge of the truth.
It is our dream. To be illuminated by the truth itself.
St. Josemaria Escriva said in Furrow 221: Be sure of this: you need to be fully formed to face the rush of people that is going to press upon us with a specific and urgent question: “Well then, what’s to be done?”
What does it mean to be fully formed? Fr. Eric Nicolai peaches at Chipnee Camp in Fort Burwell, Ontario, July 2, 2022.
Music: Handel’s Rinaldo opera, aria, “Lascia ch’io pianga”, arranged for guitar by Bert Alink.
Thumbnail: Fra Angelico St Peter Preaching in the Presence of St Mark 1433, museum of San Marco, Florence. Wiki Commons.
For more videos: https://www.youtube.com/c/EricNicolai/videos

The Urgency of Being Fully Formed

In today’s podcast, Msgr. Fred Dolan reflects on seeking the presence of God amidst the challenging reality we face today. Throughout Lent we have been journeying alongside Christ in the desert, looking inward to assess what we need to change to become a Christ-like image in the world today. During this period of social distancing, we are reminded to seek consolation in the Gospel message and to seek opportunities for spiritual growth. St. Josemaria explains: “I am happy…for I see that the Lord is seeking me again, that the Lord is still my Father. We are loved by God, and we will let the Holy Spirit act in us and purify us, so that we can embrace the Son of God on the cross, and rise with him, because the resurrection is rooted in the cross” (Christ is Passing By, no. 66). <a rel="payment" href="https://stjosemaria.org/give/">Support the show</a>THANK YOU FOR LISTENING! Let us know that our podcast is important to you:<ul><li>Share your favorite episodes with others and leave us a rating or review.</li><li>Stay connected with us on <a href='https://www.facebook.com/stjosemariainst/'>Facebook</a> and <a href='https://www.instagram.com/stjosemariainst/'>Instagram</a>. </li><li>Subscribe to our weekly newsletter: <a href='https://stjosemaria.org/subscribe/'>www.stjosemaria.org</a></li></ul>Also, if you enjoy the podcast, please consider helping us keep our episodes free and accessible for all our listeners: <a href='https://stjosemaria.org/give/'>Give today!</a> <a href='https://stjosemaria.org/subscribe/'> </a>